Damn This Backwards Evolution of Speech!


I feel the need to say the word ‘pleasure’. I want to meet someone who will say “pleased to meet you”, to which I shall reply “oh, but the pleasure is mine”. But oh no, people don’t say “pleased to meet you” anymore. They say “nice to meet you”, or “good to meet you”. Which is really quite depressing. Because I want to be able to act like a creepy mistress from the past. Or, you know, a chivalrous gentleman, but creepy mistress just sounds so much more fun! In my head it comes complete with hand-kissing and a limo and looking like Jessica Rabbit. Which doesn’t particularly make sense. But even so…

On another ‘Damn This Backwards Evolution of Speech!’ note, that blasted dictionary has decided to add more stupid ‘words’ to its word list. According to Oxford Dictionary, I may now use the ‘words’ tweeps, totes, ridic, lolz, Wikipedian, ripped, vajazzle, and mwahahaha, in an essay if I so please. Even though despite the fact that all of them are some form of slang, they’ve also spelt ‘muahahaha’ incorrectly. It’s totally a U, Oxford. Oh, no, hang on. According to your failed list, it’s totes a U.


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